BURNOUT Series: B Is For Boundaries

border fence barbwire

Burnout is an epidemic.   We're seeing it all throughout our country and across the planet.   We're running into situations where people are leaving their jobs or they're going out on leave for a long time because they just simply can't take it anymore. Recently I posted an image that said burnout but each letter in burnout meant something.  The letter B for burnout starts off with boundaries. I think a key component in dealing with your burnout is boundaries or in many cases a lack of boundaries. You're going to burnout; it's inevitable if your self-worth and your self-care get impacted when you don't have boundaries in your life.

 When you hear the word boundaries a lot of people think border walls or boundaries around of sports field or something along those lines.  Personal boundaries are important. You have to take care of yourself first. We've all heard the analogy of putting on the oxygen mask first if you're an airplane. Hopefully you never experience that because it's quite traumatic for people that have seen that situation happen before. 

You're on an airplane, masks drop, everyone starts freaking out, but again in that panic state you have to take care of yourself in a self-care state. 

 In all aspects of your life, you have to take care of yourself so boundaries are important. 

 How do you implement boundaries in your life if you don't have them?  Just like anything you have to implement them slowly and you have to see what works and what doesn't. 

 Saying no is a boundary. 

 Don't overcommit yourself.

 Don't spend so much time giving of others or giving to others without making sure you take care of yourself first, because you can't serve if you're empty if you're empty you're not going to be able to help anybody. And unfortunately many of us find ourselves under those situations where we are constantly giving and giving and we're not giving to ourselves. 

 I understand that. I get it. I am a reformed people pleaser, and those people have a goal to help others. And sometimes when someone is not in agreement with you on your ability to give to him or her when they expect it (pre-having boundaries) then what happens is they get angry.  If you're anti-confrontational you take that personally.  Remember they're projecting out you. They're projecting their wants and their desires what they want and what they desire and what's an emergency to them may not be an emergency to you. 

 You have to look at things from a perspective of what is best for me to be able to help people when I can. But ultimately it boils down to you have to help yourself first. And if you don't do that you're not going to help anybody at least not in the way that you'd want to. 

 The next post will feature the first letter ā€œUā€ in BURNOUT.

 Be well!


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I help people recover from or prevent burnout in their lives.  Schedule a 20 minute chat to discuss your stress and/or burnout with me.